Posted in Inspiration, lent, travel

Be Satisfied with Me

Everyone longs to give themselves completely to someone,
to have a deep soul relationship with another,
to be loved thoroughly and exclusively,

But to a Christian, God says, “No, not until you are satisfied,
fulfilled and content with being loved by Me alone,
with giving yourself totally and unreservedly to Me.
With having an intensely personal and unique relationship with Me alone.

Discovering that only in Me is your satisfaction to be found,
will you be capable of the perfect human relationship,
that I have planned for you.
you will never be united to another
until you are united with Me.
Exclusive of anyone or anything else.
Exclusive of any other desires or longings.
I want you to stop planning, to stop wishing, and allow Me to give you
the most thrilling plan in existing… one you cannot imagine.
I want you to have the best. Please allow Me to bring it to you.

You keep watching Me, expecting the greatest things.
Keep experiencing the satisfaction that I am.
Keep listening and learning the things that I tell you.
Just wait, that’s all. Don’t be anxious, don’t worry
don’t look around at the things others have gotten
or that I have given them.
Don’t look around at the things you want,
just keep looking off and away up to Me,
or you’ll miss what I want to show you.

And then, when you’re ready, I’ll surprise you with a love
far more wonderful than you could dream of.
You see, until you are ready, and until the one I have for you is ready,
I am working even at this moment
to have both of you ready at the same time.
Until you are both satisfied exclusively with Me
and the life I prepared for you,
you won’t be able to experience the love that exemplified your relationship with Me.
And this is perfect love.

And dear one, I want you to have this most wonderful love,
I want you to see in the flesh a picture of your relationship with Me.
And to enjoy materially and concretely the everlasting union of beauty,
perfection and love that I offer you with Myself.
Know that I love you utterly. I AM God.
Believe it and be satisfied.

By: St. Anthony of Padua

Posted in Inspiration, lent

Lenten Reflection Two

“In my deepest wound I saw your glory and it astounded me.” – Saint Augustine

Healing of a Blind Man by Brain Jekel
Healing of a Blind Man by Brain Jekel

“As [Jesus] passed by, He saw a man blind from birth. And His disciples asked Him, ‘Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he would be born blind?’ Jesus answered, ‘It was neither that this man sinned, nor his parents; but it was so that the works of God might be displayed in him.’” (John 9:1-3) This reading  reminded me of a conversation God had with Moses in The Old Testament. “The Lord said to him, ‘Who has made man’s mouth? Or who makes him mute or deaf, or seeing or blind? Is it not I, the Lord?’” (Exodus 4:11). God does not make mistakes. Every action of His is intentional.

It’s interesting to think that people once blamed their physical maladies on their personal sins and on the sins of others. It is just further proof of how we often forget that all things come from God and in turn, all things reflect the glory of God. This does not exclude the role of suffering from the will and glory of God. Often in our suffering it is difficult to see things clearly. Just as Jesus granted the blind man eyesight, He grants us a new perspective through suffering as well.

Imagine the feeling of experiencing color and light for the first time. I imagine it to be an overwhelming sensory experience- a great mixture of excitement and nervousness. When the blind man showed himself to the Pharisees they did not believe that he had been healed- they even went as far to bring the blind man’s parents into the situation. In the end, he was cast out of the temple, but there in his exile, he was once again met by Jesus.

This story tells of a healing twofold: First, Jesus healed the man’s physical blindness; Second, He healed the blind man spiritually through his suffering. His physical blindness was not the true blindness he needed to address. His blindness serves as an example for us. We must see suffering in a new light. Jesus never promised life would be easy, but He did promise to always stay by our side. It is through the brokenness and sorrow of this life that we can see the love of Christ in our deepest wounds. Hopefully, in turn, like the blind man, we will bow down and worship Him.

Posted in Inspiration, lent

Lenten Reflection One


Reflection: Jesus Falls for the First Time
The Third Station of the Cross

The third station of the cross: Jesus falls for the first time. This is one of my favorite stations we stumbled upon on the Via Dolorosa. I never imagined this scene from this perspective before. It’s humbling to imagine the anguish of the angles during Christ’s walk to Calvary. These beautiful heavenly beings were created to praise God in all things; they had to have been at a complete loss. There is so much to talk about in this scene, but the most significant for me is that Jesus got back up again. He had the weight of the world’s sins on His shoulders, but look at His face. He was tired, but He was not going to giving up.

How many times in my life have I been discouraged by the weight of my own sin? How many times have I wanted to give up because things got hard? I can just imagine an understanding smirk on Christ’s face as He fell. His earthly body may have given out, but He knew He wasn’t finished yet. Following the example of Christ, we get back up and keep going onwards on our pilgrimage to Heaven. In Him we find all hope, honor, and glory. I pray that everyone’s Lenten journey is fruitful. Be assured, I am praying for you. I know I could use a few myself!

We adore You,
O Lord Jesus Christ,
in this Church and all the Churches of the world,
and we bless You,
because, by Your holy Cross You have redeemed the world.

I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz, or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off. I love you as certain dark things are to be loved, in secret, between the shadow and the soul.

I love you as the plant that never blooms
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride; so I love you because I know no other way than this: where I does not exist, nor you, so close that your hand on my chest is my hand, so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep.

By: Pablo Neruda

Sonnet XVII

Posted in Random


I still remember the rain drops rolling down my car windows as I sat in my boyfriend’s (now husband) driveway when he paused and asked me a very unexpected question. This date had been like many of our previous dates before; we’d grabbed a bite to eat and headed over to the old dollar movie theatre in our hometown to watch a new-oldish film. Our relationship was so innocent then.

It was just another rainy summer day in the south; my hair was frizzy beyond any hopes of repair because of the humidity and Kurtis looked the same as usual. He was wearing his khaki cargo shorts, t-shirt (probably AC/DC), and black Dr. Scholes tennis shoes. I can’t help but smile when I look back and remember those moments. He always looked great to me, old man shoes and all.

I remember nervously wondering what Kurtis wanted to talk about. Many thoughts began racing through my mind, but the most prominent was “he’s going to break up with me isn’t he?” I kept trying to replay every conversation we had leading up to that day, and I couldn’t come up with anything. So, I braced myself for the worst, but he asked for something much sweeter. Kurtis asked for a kiss. His first kiss. I remember being so taken back by that question, but so humbled that he asked for my consent. I never want to forget moments like that. The small moments that become such large corner stones in our lifetime together. The small moments that remind me of how great of a person my husband is. He’s my dearest and most cherished friend.

Posted in travel


Man, I love Chicago. I love the skyline. I love the shopping. I love the overall character of the city. To be honest, I was very hesitant to make the trip back to the Windy City. The last time we had traveled to Chicago I had a sinus infection so bad we had to cut our tip short. It was horrible!  I kept getting bad motion sickness and nausea. I couldn’t breathe through my nose, and I completely lost my sense of taste by the end of the trip. The doctor I went to in Chicago prescribed a super strong antibiotic. It was that bad. Yeah, with that picture in mind, it’s easy to understand why I was so hesitant to return.

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The drive from Atlanta to Chicago was much easier this time around. Luckily, we carpooled with a friend and her sister, and we were able to break up the driving times. My favorite part of the drive is this section of road about thirty minutes outside of Chicago. I love driving through the wind farm – it is a beautiful sight to see when the sun is rising. That was one of my original highlights from the first trip. This journey was so different from the last; even the tollrode people were much nicer this time around.


Our friend, Andy, hosted us during our stay in Chicago. His apartment is right on the shoreline of Lake Michigan. The sunsets over the lake we breathtaking! We explored the neighboring areas and as the days progressed we hit the basic Chicago highlights. We went to Giordanos to got a deep dish pizza. It was pretty good, but I’m just not a fan on deep dish. It’s just too much bread for me. We explored along the shore of Lake Michigan and found a restaurant along the shoreline. It was nice sitting on the wooden beach chairs and eating Chicago dogs and crepes.

Our anniversary: Navy Pier

Our third year wedding anniversary fell during our two week stay. So, we spent the day at Navy Pier. I really loved the pier, but it was way too touristy; although, it did have a beautiful view of the Chicago skyline. The pier has a plethora of restaurants, ferriswheel rides, an inside water garden, and the swing rides that spin you in the air. It was fun seeing the city from a different perspective.


Exploring the  Magnificant Mile

The magnificicant mile is the most ridiculous shopping area I’ve ever experienced. Several big companies like Burberry and Gucci have their flagship stores there. I’ve discovered new designers I’ve never heard of before and discovered new clothing brands. I feel pretty late to the party, but I really like this store called UniQulo. It’s a Japanese company, and it brings Asian fashion to the US. The clothes are really well made, but the clothes run small. I know I had to size up one on everything.

Another cool thing about this store is that it has a Starbucks on the top floor. I could see my husband’s eyes gloss over in sheer boredom when we walked in there, but when he saw there was a “retreat” up stairs he was gone in a flash, haha!


Skokie and Jollibee

Our day in Skokie was a solem one. We visited the Holocaust Memorial Museaum. It reminded me of why that was my concentration in history. My primary focus was on the treatment of the disabled during the holocaust and the programs that developed from that. It’s rather grim, but it is a memory that needs to be preserved. On a happier note…

I finally got to try Jollibee! Jollibee is a big restaurant chain from the Philippines. I was so excited to be there! It was the only place in Chicago where I wasn’t the only obvious Filipino. It was great having the chance to blend in for a while. Honestly, was one of my favorite highlights from the trip. When we arrived back to Andy’s place, my husband received a very unexpected phone call.


The Field Museum

This was the big day we’d been waiting for. Kurtis had to fly to TN for a job interview, and I stayed behind in Chicago with Andy. We ate Chick-fil-a and then we explored the Field Museum. It’s crazy to imagine that we barely scratched the surface of what the museaum had to offer. I could spend a week there just slowly moving through the exhibit. My favorite part was when we were walking through the gift shop and I stumbled across the museaum house brew beer they named after the dinosaurs.


After we gathered my husband, we were very excited to pay homage to wrigleyville and see where the Cubs play baseball. We ate at a really awesome vegetarian restaurant. Those vegan milkshakes were the best things I’ve ever had! Overall, we had a wonderful time and I’m so happy I didn’t get sick, lol! I can’t wait until my next adventure to the Windy City!