Posted in Inspiration, lent, travel

Be Satisfied with Me

Everyone longs to give themselves completely to someone,
to have a deep soul relationship with another,
to be loved thoroughly and exclusively,

But to a Christian, God says, “No, not until you are satisfied,
fulfilled and content with being loved by Me alone,
with giving yourself totally and unreservedly to Me.
With having an intensely personal and unique relationship with Me alone.

Discovering that only in Me is your satisfaction to be found,
will you be capable of the perfect human relationship,
that I have planned for you.
you will never be united to another
until you are united with Me.
Exclusive of anyone or anything else.
Exclusive of any other desires or longings.
I want you to stop planning, to stop wishing, and allow Me to give you
the most thrilling plan in existing… one you cannot imagine.
I want you to have the best. Please allow Me to bring it to you.

You keep watching Me, expecting the greatest things.
Keep experiencing the satisfaction that I am.
Keep listening and learning the things that I tell you.
Just wait, that’s all. Don’t be anxious, don’t worry
don’t look around at the things others have gotten
or that I have given them.
Don’t look around at the things you want,
just keep looking off and away up to Me,
or you’ll miss what I want to show you.

And then, when you’re ready, I’ll surprise you with a love
far more wonderful than you could dream of.
You see, until you are ready, and until the one I have for you is ready,
I am working even at this moment
to have both of you ready at the same time.
Until you are both satisfied exclusively with Me
and the life I prepared for you,
you won’t be able to experience the love that exemplified your relationship with Me.
And this is perfect love.

And dear one, I want you to have this most wonderful love,
I want you to see in the flesh a picture of your relationship with Me.
And to enjoy materially and concretely the everlasting union of beauty,
perfection and love that I offer you with Myself.
Know that I love you utterly. I AM God.
Believe it and be satisfied.

By: St. Anthony of Padua

Posted in Inspiration, lent

Lenten Reflection Two

“In my deepest wound I saw your glory and it astounded me.” – Saint Augustine

Healing of a Blind Man by Brain Jekel
Healing of a Blind Man by Brain Jekel

“As [Jesus] passed by, He saw a man blind from birth. And His disciples asked Him, ‘Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he would be born blind?’ Jesus answered, ‘It was neither that this man sinned, nor his parents; but it was so that the works of God might be displayed in him.’” (John 9:1-3) This reading  reminded me of a conversation God had with Moses in The Old Testament. “The Lord said to him, ‘Who has made man’s mouth? Or who makes him mute or deaf, or seeing or blind? Is it not I, the Lord?’” (Exodus 4:11). God does not make mistakes. Every action of His is intentional.

It’s interesting to think that people once blamed their physical maladies on their personal sins and on the sins of others. It is just further proof of how we often forget that all things come from God and in turn, all things reflect the glory of God. This does not exclude the role of suffering from the will and glory of God. Often in our suffering it is difficult to see things clearly. Just as Jesus granted the blind man eyesight, He grants us a new perspective through suffering as well.

Imagine the feeling of experiencing color and light for the first time. I imagine it to be an overwhelming sensory experience- a great mixture of excitement and nervousness. When the blind man showed himself to the Pharisees they did not believe that he had been healed- they even went as far to bring the blind man’s parents into the situation. In the end, he was cast out of the temple, but there in his exile, he was once again met by Jesus.

This story tells of a healing twofold: First, Jesus healed the man’s physical blindness; Second, He healed the blind man spiritually through his suffering. His physical blindness was not the true blindness he needed to address. His blindness serves as an example for us. We must see suffering in a new light. Jesus never promised life would be easy, but He did promise to always stay by our side. It is through the brokenness and sorrow of this life that we can see the love of Christ in our deepest wounds. Hopefully, in turn, like the blind man, we will bow down and worship Him.

Posted in Inspiration, lent

Lenten Reflection One


Reflection: Jesus Falls for the First Time
The Third Station of the Cross

The third station of the cross: Jesus falls for the first time. This is one of my favorite stations we stumbled upon on the Via Dolorosa. I never imagined this scene from this perspective before. It’s humbling to imagine the anguish of the angles during Christ’s walk to Calvary. These beautiful heavenly beings were created to praise God in all things; they had to have been at a complete loss. There is so much to talk about in this scene, but the most significant for me is that Jesus got back up again. He had the weight of the world’s sins on His shoulders, but look at His face. He was tired, but He was not going to giving up.

How many times in my life have I been discouraged by the weight of my own sin? How many times have I wanted to give up because things got hard? I can just imagine an understanding smirk on Christ’s face as He fell. His earthly body may have given out, but He knew He wasn’t finished yet. Following the example of Christ, we get back up and keep going onwards on our pilgrimage to Heaven. In Him we find all hope, honor, and glory. I pray that everyone’s Lenten journey is fruitful. Be assured, I am praying for you. I know I could use a few myself!

We adore You,
O Lord Jesus Christ,
in this Church and all the Churches of the world,
and we bless You,
because, by Your holy Cross You have redeemed the world.

I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz, or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off. I love you as certain dark things are to be loved, in secret, between the shadow and the soul.

I love you as the plant that never blooms
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride; so I love you because I know no other way than this: where I does not exist, nor you, so close that your hand on my chest is my hand, so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep.

By: Pablo Neruda

Sonnet XVII

Posted in Inspiration


Every event in life has its purpose. Nothing happens on accident. Every event, every word, every action was carefully crafted by the hands of God.

I often think about that before I go to the monastery. I always seem to go before something important in my life happens. My first visit to the monastery was just before my confirmation. My second trip was right after my husband and I got engaged. I remember, my priest friend would tease me and say, “it’s not too late, I know a convent right down the road.” My third milestone visit  to the monastery was right after I had gotten married. Finally, the last time I visited was the summer before I went to the Holy Land. Now that I’ve visited again…I have no idea what to expect…what moment or what healing, but I put whatever it may be in the steady hands of God.






I’d forgotten the peace I find there. The love, the community, the tradition, and the brotherhood. All of our paths have intertwined for a reason…one in which at this time is a mystery to me, but I recognize that it started long before us…long before our grandparents and great grandparents. We’ve all been connected and intertwined by the careful handiwork of God. We’re all part of the redemptive story…all the lives we touch and our daily interactions aid only in the slightest way. It’s all about finding God in the ordinary.


**Quick edit: I have a sneaking suspicion as to what it may be**