I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz, or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off. I love you as certain dark things are to be loved, in secret, between the shadow and the soul.

I love you as the plant that never blooms
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride; so I love you because I know no other way than this: where I does not exist, nor you, so close that your hand on my chest is my hand, so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep.

By: Pablo Neruda

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Sonnet XVII

Posted in Random

Petrichor

I still remember the rain drops rolling down my car windows as I sat in my boyfriend’s (now husband) driveway when he paused and asked me a very unexpected question. This date had been like many of our previous dates before; we’d grabbed a bite to eat and headed over to the old dollar movie theatre in our hometown to watch a new-oldish film. Our relationship was so innocent then.

It was just another rainy summer day in the south; my hair was frizzy beyond any hopes of repair because of the humidity and Kurtis looked the same as usual. He was wearing his khaki cargo shorts, t-shirt (probably AC/DC), and black Dr. Scholes tennis shoes. I can’t help but smile when I look back and remember those moments. He always looked great to me, old man shoes and all.

I remember nervously wondering what Kurtis wanted to talk about. Many thoughts began racing through my mind, but the most prominent was “he’s going to break up with me isn’t he?” I kept trying to replay every conversation we had leading up to that day, and I couldn’t come up with anything. So, I braced myself for the worst, but he asked for something much sweeter. Kurtis asked for a kiss. His first kiss. I remember being so taken back by that question, but so humbled that he asked for my consent. I never want to forget moments like that. The small moments that become such large corner stones in our lifetime together. The small moments that remind me of how great of a person my husband is. He’s my dearest and most cherished friend.

Posted in Creativity, Random

Father’s Day

I have such a difficult time navigating my feelings around the anniversary of my father’s death and Father’s Day. As time passes, it becomes easier to handle. When I feel as if I’m starting to “get over it” my heart aches for his missing presence in my life. I remember a conversation I had with a friend of mine and he reminded me that when you lose someone very special too you, you never stop grieving because the love for them never goes away. As I reflected on his words, I’ve come to realize it’s true. I’m always going to miss my dad, but that doesn’t mean I have to be sad forever. I can be happy and look forward still on days like Father’s Day.

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“This I recall to my mind, Therefore I have hope. The Lord’s lovingkindnesses indeed never cease, For His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; Great is Your faithfulness. “The Lord is my portion,” says my soul, “Therefore I have hope in Him.” The Lord is good to those who wait for Him, To the person who seeks Him.” – Lamentations 3:21-25

So, with that being said, this year I decided to do a special project for my father-in-law!  I made a really cool matchstick cross with abstract shades of blue and a slight dash of orange and white. It was a lot of fun to make! I asked my best friend to come over and help me burn matchsticks to create the cross.

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I was really inspired by a few different images I happened to come across on Pinterest. I knew I wanted to do something a bit different and a combination of these two things (the background and cross) really worked out well for my first time. I just couldnt figure out how to make it feel like the cross was coming out more.

 

I choose a more abstract background for the cross to create a more dazed and dreamy effect. The color idea is from the first image and I did my own special twist with it. I love the blurred lines that were created. I’m fascinated with the idea of not knowing where lines begin or end, I enjoy the exerpience of just being placed in an unknown part of it. In regards to the cross, I wanted it to feel like it was floating above the abstract piece. Unfortunately, I couldn’t quite figure out just how to create that effect. There can always be more work done to it, but overall I’m pretty pleased with it.

 

 

 

Posted in Random

Anticipation

Between my countdown to the end of the school year and when I left for Israel were a pretty crazy two weeks.  I had been experiencing  lot of anxiety about this trip. It was mostly dealing with the anticipation of experiencing the unknown. I wanted to make sure I spent time with family and friends before I left for two months. On Saturday, I went to Lane Packing with Mike and grabbed lunch. It was such a beautiful day, and it was so nice being able to hang out with an old friend. After  that outing, I went to Sacred Heart for Mass. My original plan was to drive down to Warner Robins to pick up my mom and celebrate a late mother’s day with her since Kurtis and I  were traveling that weekend, but I just decided to make it a day trip instead. I took my mom back to Atlanta with me to spend the night!

 

On Sunday, mom and I left Atlanta and headed back down to Warner Robins. I was originally going to take her either to the Coke Museum or the aquarium, but we decided to head down early to spend time with my sister and Lillie instead. It was fun. It’s been a while since I’ve seen my sister, and I’m glad to see that she’s doing better. Later that evening, I was able to attend the Senior Send off for Lifeteen. I still can’t believe that it was time for them to graduate already! I still remember meeting them when they were sophomores! It was humbling being able to serve them when I was on core team. I know that they will do abundantly well no matter what they do or where they go.

 I experienced a wide range of emotions the last week of school, but overall it was very nostalgic. By the end of the school year, my students seemed so much “bigger” then they were in the beginning. It’s amazing getting the opportunity to guide and watch them grow.  I’m very proud of myself for not tearing up during their moving up ceremony, but it’s hard sending them on. However, I know that they were ready. Later that night, I took a painting class with Carolyn and Annie! We painted Van Gogh’s Sunflowers! I still have really mixed feelings about my sunflower. I really like it, but I don’t at the same time.

That weekend, after I finished packing and handling all the minor stuff I need before the trip, I was able to spend time with Deidra and Annie. We went to eat at my favorite French Cafe in Decatur and got Jeni’s Ice cream after! On Sunday, we went hiking at Carter Lake. The weather was okay, but it was so refreshing being able to swim in the lake (despite my hatred for  lake water).  On Monday, I just spent Memorial Day relaxing around the house.

Despite it all, I needed those crazy times and chill times to make it through those anxiety filed two weeks.

 

 

Posted in Random

Baby, it’s cold outside

January: Auld Lang Syne and my quarter life crises

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For New Years Eve we hosted a group of friends to welcome in the New Year. We had food, music, drinks, and did the countdown for the ball drop. It wasn’t anything too crazy, but it was just really nice having our group of friends together again. A few days later, I turned twenty-five! I can’t believe that I’m a quarter century! I feel so old, but I know I’m really not. It’s an interesting mix of feelings. I have to admit, when I think about my ideal life plan, I’m not quite where I had expected to be, but I definitely  love what I have instead. For  my birthday, Kurtis surprised me with a highEnglish tea party at the St. Regis Hotel with a small group of friends. It was so much fun and the macaroons there were AWESOME!

February: Valentin’s Day and  Mountain Weekend

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For Valentine’s Day, Kurtis planned a trip to Covington, Georgia to stay at the Twelve Oaks Bed and Breakfast! It was so cute and breakfast was awesome! Anyhow, we explored the downtown square and ate at a small little Italian Restaurant. There wasn’t too much around the inn except for the town square, but we did find an awesome ice cream shop.  Oh! We even saw Mystic Gill where they film the Vampire Diaries.

Later that month we went up to Helen, Georgia and spent the weekend at a cabin with a group of friends from Emory! Going back to Helen brought back so many memories! It was fun getting to visit a few of the same shops we had visited when we were on our honeymoon. It’s crazy to think we’ve been married for almost two years now! We visited a bunch of wineries, antique shops, and pottery stores. I love Willows Pottery. They always have such a unique collection. I love all of the colors and everything is made locally.

March: Easter

Easter was pretty low key this year. I’m happy to say that I was able to spend Holy Thursday and Good Friday at Sacred Heart. I always love going back to visit when I’m at home. I just grew so much during my time there and it’ll always be a special place to me. It was awesome being back home. I got to spend time with my family and get my nails done with  friends. After mass on Good Friday, Kurtis and I headed back to Atlanta to prepare for Easter.  On Sunday we went to Easter mass at St. Thomas More. After, we hosted a small get together for our friends at Emory. Overall, it was a pretty laid back Triduum this year.

April: Maximilian Kolbe and Exploring the Belt line 

The highlight of the month was definitely being able to visit the relic of my patron saint with my godmother! A few months ago, Anne, posted an article on my Facebook page talking about St. Max’s relics tour date in the United States. We immediately made plans to go visit him inGeorgia. We got up super early on Saturday to make our mini pilgrimage to see him. It was about a 30-45 min drive to get to St. Philip Benizi Catholic Church.  So, my favorite part of the trip has to be the moment when godmother realized that the relic of St. Max Kolbe was actually his beard hair. She was like, “we drove all the way out here for BEARD HAIR?!” it was pretty priceless, lol! We spent a about 30-45 minutes venerating the saint and then we popped into the chapel for adoration. After our adventure to the church we explored downtown Jonesboro and then stopped for food at Folks. It was an awesome day! I’m so happy I picked him to be my patron saint. My focus in history was Holocaust studies and he just seemed perfect for me.

Later that month, I explored the belt line with my best friend and her mom. We went to this cute little cafe in Edgewood for food and then continued to explore the belt line with thier dog, Scooter! Towards the end of our walk we stopped by Krogg Street market for some ice cream at Jeni’s (I highly recommend their reisiling poached pear sorbet btw).  It was such a beautiful day out.

May: Florida and getting ready for summer

Kurits and I drove down to Florida to drop off his car at his grandfather’s house. This summer we’re having interior  repair and body work done to his car. The drive didn’t take as long as we had expected. It was about 4 1/2 hours. It was nice going down and spending time with his grandparents. We got to see his grandfather collection of restored classic cars and fly in the airplane. Well, Kurtis flew in the plane. I’m not too fond of flying, but it looked like a lot of fun though!

We were only able to stay for one night because I had work the following day, but it was nice being able to sit and spend time in the “country”.  The drive home felt way longer than it did going down. Luckily, Kurtis took over driving after we stopped to get Fazoli’s and finally after four hours of driving we finally arrived back home.

 

 

Posted in Random

The Changing of the leaves

Wow…I can’t believe I have written a post in four months! Life has just been really busy lately. I started my new job in August and I absolutely love it! I’m working with pre-K this year and they definitely keep me on my toes. This has definitely been a learning year for me.
September: Living in High Cotton
The Georgia National Fair was so much fun! It was great being able to bring one of our close friends with us to see our home time and visit family.  Unfortunately, I missed it the past few years, but we were finally able to make it this year! We had cotton candy, rode on roller coaster rides, walked around, checked out the animals, and watched the fireworks. The Perry fairgrounds always being back so many memories!


October: Trick or Treat
Halloween was pretty fun.  I went through so much trouble decorating and buying a super awesome candy jar and  we only had like three trick-or-treaters all night! I was a little annoyed. With that being said,  I had so much candy leftover! It wasn’t all lame,  a few days before a friend from the law school invited us to her Halloween party! We dressed up as the Tardis and Doctor Who-the eleventh doctor of course! We placed second in the costume contest!

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November: Gobble Gobble
My Thanksgiving was terrible this year! I had sinus surgery the day before thanksgiving and I felt awful, but luckily, my mom was able to come up and take care of me and helped out around the house that week.

December: Winter break
December flew by! We started off winter break by attending our friends wedding in Lakeland, Florida. It was a very beautiful wedding! Following the wedding we met up with a couple of our friends in Orlando and spent the night at their place. The next day we went to Disney! It was awesome seeing Disney all decked out for Christmas! We visited Epcot and Animal Kingdom. Disney was so exhausting, but so much fun! After dinner we went to our hotel and stayed there for the night. The next day we went back to our hometown for Christmas! I always love going to midnight mass at Sacred Heart. It always reminds me of home. After mass we went home and opened presents! The next day we stayed around the house and watched old Christmas cartoons and ate cookies.

After Christmas Day we went up to our aunts house for her annual day after Christmas party! It was nice getting to spend time with family, but after the party Kurtis and I went back home. We were exhausted! I can’t believe that we did that all in ONE week! The following week we prepped for New Years and caught up on some much needed sleep.

 

Posted in Random

Love’s Philosophy

By: Percy Bysshe Shelley

The fountains mingle with the river
And the rivers with the ocean,

The winds of heaven mix for ever

   With a sweet emotion;

Nothing in the world is single;

   All things by a law divine

In one spirit meet and mingle.

   Why not I with thine?—

See the mountains kiss high heaven

   And the waves clasp one another;

No sister-flower would be forgiven

   If it disdained its brother;

And the sunlight clasps the earth

   And the moonbeams kiss the sea:

What is all this sweet work worth

   If thou kiss not me?